Saturday, September 11, 2010

More Things to Not Do

-Do not ask clerks to sift through their quarters for the state quarters that you need. In fact, do not collect the state quarters for your grandkids. The fun of collecting is the hunt and the acquisition. If you collect all the state quarters in full and give them to your grandkids, they will probably just spend them on drugs.

-Do not buy an inexpensive pot, use it for 15 years, abuse it with abrasive cleaners because you are a cleaning fanatic, and then take it back to the store where you think you bought it, claiming the pot spontaneously corroded and that it has a life time guarantee.

-Do not expect the clerk to know the exact chemical make-up of the stain of some cheap clearance table imported from China. And when the clerk goes to the trouble of calling the company and questioning them, do not be surprised when they don't know either. Because nobody knows and it doesn't matter anyway; you are just being a crazy old person. Don't do it.

-Oh, yea, do not put your wet or hot dishes or glasses on a wood table. Just be an adult and use a coaster. Or a trivet. Or both at the same time.

-As I've stated before, DO NOT ever EXPECT free gift wrap. Be gracious and thankful when it's offered and available. Don't ball out clerks for charging what they are supposed to charge.

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