Weekly highlights!

- Ok, this might sound ageist, but I find that a lot of annoying cellphone offenders are slightly older. You hear a phone blasting the Sex and the City theme song and there's a grandma digging in her purse, and not to silence it, but to answer and then have a VERY LOUD conversation no matter what she was doing when the phone rang. When people talk about bad cell etiquette, they often imply that it's Those Damn Kids, can't be without their phones, no manners, blahblah. But the kids know better. They know you are listening. The "kids" are texting. Why would you actually CALL someone?

-I have a game. Whenever someone uses a plastic shopping bag (or bags), I try to calculate what percentage the cost of the bag is in the pre-tax price of their purchase. It kind of makes me hate people, so I am quitting that game.

-There were some people lingering in the store tonight, after we were obviously closed and every other shopper had left. I was being friendly and attentive, letting them know we were closed without being too pushy. "Oh, we're just killing time while we wait for a friend. This store is such a great place to window shop!!" I thought my co-workers might blow up. The guy bought some weird thing at the last minute; I think he thought he was "winning." Like, I can keep these people here if I want. Consumers!, don't do this. A closed store is not a place to "kill time." That is what bars and coffee shops are for. And "window shopping" is done outside, through the windows, often when the store is closed. If you are just killing time and the store is closed, leave. Don't be a dick.

-The handicap spot is for handicap people. Do not park there if you do not qualify. Do not ask the clerk for permission to park in the handicap, even "real quick." And for god'ssake, if you are a perfectly able-bodied, pert young blond bride picking up packages that you have received for what we all assume will be your first of many marriages, do not park in the handicap spot.