Every once in awhile, when a customer has been horrible and then has me hold or store merchandise for them, I might rub it on my butt.  Over the pants, on the cheeks, like what a chair sees when you approach.  I get giggles thinking about how much this amuses me.  Then, when I hand it to the customer later, I think "I rubbed that on my butt."
Immature, perhaps, but I don't care!
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