tales from the other side (of the counter)

I was at one of those stores that buys used clothes for cash or trade.  I had one modest bag of shoes that I was pretty confident they would accept.  There was quite the line-up when I arrived.  Sometimes when this happens, I shop and then go back to the line; this time around, I didn't want to take the chance that someone would come in with a bunch of stuff and take what could have been my place.

There was one guy with a garbage bag of clothes at the counter, a girl with a small bag behind him, followed by two college kids with paper shopping bags which did not appear to be holding much because there was no bulge.  Then there was me, playing Tetris on my phone.

The girls working got through the garbage bag of clothes, at which point they start going through another of his garbage bags.  Dude had 5 garbage bags of clothes.  FIVE.   I am repeating "garbage bags" for a reason; his clothes sucked.  I overheard him saying how his wife had cleaned out the closet and these were all the clothes.  They didn't bother to sort them at all, which I think is rude.  Do you actually think anyone is going to want to buy your gross, worn out, outdated clothing?  One of the girls actually made a yuk face when she grabbed a pile of dingy cropped camisoles.  I could see the old skin and sweat from my place in line.

The college boys left when the multiple garbage bags were revealed.  Yes!  I moved up a level.

While I was in line, another guy came in and took his place behind me.  He had EIGHT garbage bags.  I love having my choices validated.

Weekly highlights

- I love it (this is sarcasm) when parents give their children some merchandise to keep them occupied and the child destroys it while the parents shop and then the parents just stick it on some random shelf and don't say anything because they know they are crappy. How is that different than stealing or vandalism? It's sneaky, willful destruction of the property of the store. And yet, if we want them to shop with us, we have to let it happen.

- There was a lady the other day reading the back of some plates and wanted to know why they could be labeled "Microwave Safe; will get hot in microwave" since, in her opinion, getting hot in the microwave made them unsafe. We talked in circles for awhile, her stubborn and confused, and then I tried to break it up with some humor. "Well, I guess it depends on your definition of safe." She did not laugh.

- OMG! Did you know that COTTON SHRINKS!! I did and so do most of my customers. So I am so surprised when they are surprised that this fiber does in fact have this quality. And what surprises me even more is that they care. So the tablecloth has an 8 inch hang instead of 9; why does it matter?

- Throws: rugs or blankets?
Quadro jug: plastic or glass?
Birthday coupon or buy local coupon?
So many hard questions.

- There was a little boy the other day wearing translucent turquoise glasses and matching turquoise shoes with an understated, simple raincoat. He was about 4, so he was small and cute, as were his accessories. I usually don't geek out too much over the way kids are dressed because most often it is some contrived outfit picked by the parents or typical "I dressed myself!" wackiness. But this kid was special. It was weird enough that you know a parent wouldn't have done it, but more awesome than most kids would dress themselves. And it was . . . inspiring!

- I want to go to Japan so that I can buy pink Le Creuset cast iron!

Dance.

I went to work yesterday chipper and with a positive attitude, though anxious because I had a lot of errands to run on my lunch break.

Two of the earliest customers were Canadian woman, friends, shopping together. They were dressed up for a day out and one of them was dancing as she shopped and singing along with the oldies music that we were playing. It reminded me of one of the model quotes in the Boden catalog I'd been looking through the night before. Something like, "if I could go back in time: I would dance more." And why not?, I thought as I watched the customer shimmy through the aisles. Dancing is fun, right? Ladies love to dance. Look at how the customer is having so much fun!

I rang up the dancing lady. While I was wrapping her glass jars in paper to cushion them, I felt spiritual and sisterly; why shouldn't we dance when we want to and be a little wacky? We have so little time in life. Why shouldn't I be happy for womankind when they can grab some moments of joy and dance and sing?

Then I realized I was still at work. It had become busy all of a sudden and I was by myself, so I helped people in the order I saw them appear. My co-worker came and helped me ring everyone up. Dancing lady was at the counter again. Her bags were on the counter in front of her.

We are not sisters, dancing lady and I; she is the customer and I am the clerk. So why should I be surprised when she too took on a bit of superior attitude when I asked if she needed anything else? Her response, though seemingly harmless, was terse and seemed to say "do not attempt to KNOW what I NEED, retail store worker."

I do not know if I over-analyse every word that comes out of customers' mouths or if I have become very good at reading people and detecting lies and fake emotions.

Probably both.

I can help the next person in line!

Precious Customer Moments; Clerk Sarcasm

- The older couple with the matching cargo vests. The wife was wandering through the store yelling "EUGENE!" Much less tacky would be to have a lost-mate whistle. Or a cell phone.

- The young girl shopping with her mom and wearing a halter hoodie. Somehow, I've never seen one before. And it made me feel so old to realize that I would look like a fool if I tried to wear one. There are certain pieces that can only be worn by the young or the wacky.

- The woman that was trying to explain to her friend the power of her Kitchenaid mixer. "You could drive with a Kitchenaid." Car as power made me giggle.

- A customer called and asked if we sold bikini aprons. Wha? You know, aprons with a bikini printed on them.

- Another customer called and asked for bamboo bath towels. When I told her we didn't have any, she told me that we should get some because "there is at least one person that wants them." That is a great way to buy for a business. "Gosh I hope at least one person wants this item!" It is amazing that almost everyone with a request thinks that the thing they want is a really hot item and that we are going to stock it because one person asked for it, like they are doing us a favor or starting a trend. By the way, I am not hating on bamboo towels. They are great.

- I always love it when customers preface a request with their need and desire to have things that are natural, organic, and that will not "off-gas" (customers love that term), and then fold immediately because they find some gassy, unnatural, non-organic, and cheaper item. Way to stick to your ideals, consumers.

- The guy who tried to get into the store early and when we wouldn't let him, told us we "just lost a $10,000 sale"? You get the biggest eye roll of the week.

- A customer called and asked if we had anything in blue.

dressing for work

I love reading people's clothing blogs because I love to see how people wear their clothes and then read about why they put certain things together or what inspired them.

I have to wear an apron at work. I have become so used to it that I feel naked when I don't have it on and often wear aprons at home to put me in a work/project/chore mood. Other than that, I get to wear pretty much whatever I want, as long as it does not put me in danger or show too much skin.